This weeks “Celebrity Medic” features a young politician who has stolen the news headlines over the past couple months. With all the recent negative publicity, and his recent resignation from congress, many of us are left to wonder where Mr. Weiner’s career is going to take him. Now that he has left office, what is he going to do next? Well, this would be the perfect opportunity for him to take up a job in the pre-hospital medical field. After all, we are used to negative press and public scrutiny. A job like this would be right up Mr. Wiener’s alley. So that of course leaves us to ask the question of the week:
What kind of Paramedic would Anthony Weiner be?
People working at Mr. Weiner’s ambulance service wouldn’t work the traditional 12 or 24-hour shifts. Instead they would work in “sessions” that wouldn’t include weekends, holidays and the majority of the summer.
Patient care reports would come in 2 parts for Mr. Weiner’s EMS service. The first report would be completed and made available for viewing immediately after the incident. This report would be reviewed and investigated for accuracy over the course of a couple weeks. A second, revised version of the report would then be released to correct errors and inconsistencies from the previous report.
Anthony Weiner is one to take advantage of what modern technology has to offer. Rather than utilize the age-old standard of communicating through 2-way radios, he would use social-media to his advantage. Instead of just giving a verbal report of his findings, he would use his cell-phone to take pictures of his patient’s body parts in order to provide a thorough report of what he found during his assessment. These pictures would of course be posted on Twitter and addressed to the nurses at the receiving hospital.
Mr. Weiner probably thinks trauma pants and jump suits are a dying trend. He isn’t one to conform to the traditional EMS standard of uniforms. Instead, he would wear tight, gray, “trauma-shorts” and a small, white, uniform shirt. This would allow for flexibility and comfort during the hotter times of the year.
Mr. Wiener’s EMS service would require strict supervision. Fortunately, this would be provided by other former politicians who come to the service with more experience from similar backgrounds. The service would be headed by Operation’s Manager, Bill Clinton. While he is little more “old-school” and not as well versed in the on-line technology that the service utilizes, he certainly comes with great wisdom and a lot of background in employee-relations. Second in command would be handled by none other than former California Governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger. His background in keeping internal affairs confidential would prove to be extremely useful.
With Anthony’s departure from congress, this is the perfect time for him to take on a new career in the pre-hospital medical field. His public relations skills, knowledge of social-media and extensive education in human anatomy make him a perfect fit for a job as a paramedic.